Random post: of Pathetic barbers.

Posted: September 20, 2012 in Barbers, Haircut, Kinyozi, Pathetic, Silly
Tags: , , , ,

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The worst remark a guy can get from his friends after a shave is, “Ohh msee alkunyoa bado anajifunza?”
The anger is usually immediately vented on the absent barber.
“Ata sirudi huko tena.”a guy will say.
Meanwhile the ‘victim’ will hope that his hair grows exponentially so that he can get a cool haircut.

So you walk into his place of trade. The funky name drew your curiosity naturally. ‘hot kutz
kinyozi’
Save for the old Arsenal and Manchester United Team photo that spans the entire side walls, there isn’t much to show.
Mark you, Thiery Henry and Christiano Ronaldo still feature in the respective line-ups.
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They usually have the wallpapers having haircuts with models posing for them.
“Unataka namba ngapi boss?”
Depending on your taste, you pick out a number.
To cut the long story short, at the end of it, you look like someone who was shaved using a pencil-sharpener!!

The hair level is not even. The only time he can produce an even level is when you had earlier, instead of picking a number, had told him “Jordan” or “nyoa ya shule.”

The worst bit is on the ‘cut’.
For those who still get the back-cut, you simply end up looking like a peacock!
And for those of us like me who get a faded one at the back and a real one in front, we look like we have the largest forehead!
In his bid to put it in a nice curve, he ends up going farther and farther with each attempt.
He ends up getting it right though, but you end up contemplating clearing the whole head clean.
Afterwards, it’s the mkia ya ng’ombe which pains you as he uses it uncouthly, the spirit in the ka-yellow oil can which stings you along the ‘cut’ while applies it coz he applied too much pressure during the ‘cut’, then the spray of water, brush ya viatu to give you a ‘handsome’ look…and the next customer is called in as you part with your coins…with pieces of hair sticking around your shirt collar!

They are everywhere.
When I meet you with such an haircut and you ask me, I will lie straight to your face, “Me sioni ubaya nayo”
but you won’t see ,my face and the laughter am stifling coz you’ll be busy tilting your head so that I get a clear view of the disaster!

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